2014: The Year of I Just Don’t Know

trust, obey, faith

I have questions..

The way God works never ceases to surprise me.  Just when I think that perhaps I am on a certain path and heading in a certain direction, something comes along and everything changes.

Looking back at 2013, it was a year of intense spiritual and personal growth.  The Lord booted me out of complacency and into action and this blog was one of the most visible results of that upheaval.  And if you had asked me last Fall what I thought 2014 was going to look like I would have told you “more time writing, more blogging and an expansion of Matthew515.com”.

And up until around Thanksgiving I would have stuck with that answer.  But then, the new job came along at the end of September and I started working 6 days every other week.  I also lost my weekdays off and those were the days that I used to get the majority of my writing done.  Work got busier and busier and although I tried to stick with the same posting schedule, I just couldn’t keep up.  I was soon exhausted and worn out.  Something was going to have to give.

So in the month of December I made the decision to take a few weeks off from writing and to rest my mind and body a little bit.  It seems to have worked because I’m excited about writing again and I feel a spurt of mental and creative energy that I haven’t felt in several months.  I’ve got several topics lined up to write about and I’m also working on another guest poster for later this month that I think will genuinely benefit anyone who reads his work.

That being said, my job really hasn’t slowed down any and the powers that be have told us that everyone in my department is on six day workweeks until further notice.  And I’m still a Sunday School teacher, AWANA Club worker, Choir member, Church Secretary and Husband.  My responsibilities have not lessened and my time to write has not increased.

For now, the answer seems to be for me to write as I have time and energy to do so and to not try and keep a set schedule of three posts a week.  This is a big change from where I thought I would be at this point and I admit I’m having a hard time with it.  I’m praying that the Lord would give me wisdom in this area and for me not to be discouraged because things aren’t as I thought they would be.  I don’t know how many times the Lord has to show me that His timetable is not the same as mine but it’s a lesson that I am still learning.

As per the title for today, I really don’t know how 2014 is going to turn out for Matthew515 or for anything else.  And as far as that goes, I guess you could insert any future date in the title and it would still work.  No one knows what tomorrow will bring and only in hindsight do we gain a sense of perspective on what the Lord has been doing.  I know that He is working for my good and that is enough.  I will keep going and  keep trusting His unseen hand.

Apologies all around, then, if my posts aren’t regular and updates don’t happen as often as I would like them to.  I hope and pray that I will be able to get back to three posts a week at some point in the future but as to when that might be, only the Lord knows.  And I’m okay with that.

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